For Sale:

3 year old girl. Can sing, dance, and yell. Will eat almost anything, but is partial to Cafe Rio Salad, and tomatoes. Goes by the name of Faithers or Lulu, but can be trained to come by another name if desired. Does not bite. Likes to snuggle, and unlike the other children in her litter, gives good kisses. Comes with 20 complete outfits, and 5 pairs of shoes. Hair accessories upon request.

As with any offer, there is a catch. This child is a total potty training reject! She thinks that she is too busy during the day to stop for a meer minute and pee pee in the potty. She has refused bribes, is not impressed by the party and showering of gifts that happens upon her when she does manage to make it to the bathroom, and has no problem going through 12 pairs of not cheap underwear in a day. Yes... this is the fault of her mother, who waited too long to potty train this child, but nonetheless this is the defect. This is really the only reason the child is for sale. Her mother thinks that she will never potty train... thus wants to avoid the embarassment of having a high school aged child still in diapers. If this does not bother you, than this is the deal for you!

Act now and I will throw in a brand new set of Ginsu Knives and an Ab Blaster! Any reasonable offer will be accepted. Please contact me using a disposable cell phone to throw off CPS. You won't be dissapointed!! (Unless of course you don't like buying diapers until you are 97.)