Today's life lessons...

July 17, 2008:

If you are in need of money, go through any fast food drive-thru and they will give you some.

It is bothersome that Easter eggs can only be colored during Easter. White eggs are boring, and food would taste much better if "pretty" eggs were used when called for in a recipe.

Going pee pee in the potty is optional. If you have time, great. If you are busy, just go wherever you may be.

If you need something, anything at all.... Cry. Don't ask, don't point, just stand by the side of someone bigger than you... and cry. Although you are perfectly capable of articulating yourself, this is apparently too much trouble and not worth the words. Said "bigger" person will ask several probing questions until your crying get's quieter when it's closer to what you want. Kind of like the hotter and colder game, only with whailing and whining. If you doubt that this works, call my 3 year old. She has a dora cell phone and will gladly take your call, unless of course she is busy peeing in place.

Cookies are a perfectly acceptable and nutiritious lunch.

The word "mom" can induce seizures and/or involuntary outbursts of near swear words.

Stupid is a swear word. So is shut up.

If you don't like the outfit you are wearing, change seven times, throw the 7 outfits on the floor, then put back on your original outfit. You will then look fine.

And this... all before noon.